Dating after divorce is a process which exemplifies its own set of rules because of the sensitivity of the situation at hand. Your divorce might have changed you a lot, and in particular, changed your views on marriage, love, and relationship. Before you even think of online dating, you may wish to consider the following.
- What are you willing to bring in your next relationship?
- What do you wish your new partner to offer?
- Do you know why your previous marriage ended?
These are just a few factors you should evaluate to make sure that you are in the right shape to start dating. When entering the dating scene, you should understand that what you had in the previous marriage is already gone and should at least be forgotten. Trying to replace a marriage or a partner is impossible since every relationship is unique. You have also changed a lot since your last relationship: therefore, it is important that you portray the “fresh” you in your dating journey.
Actually, dating after a divorce might be awkward. Rejection might signify a different tone, and certainly, you might be feeling a bit doubtful about your viability as a catch. That is normal, but you must try to handle the setbacks as they come.
Do’s and Don’ts
Do not pine
In general, the probability of getting a perfect response on a dating site may be low. Sitting by the laptop waiting for a reply and trying to think what the other person is feeling is called “pinning”. Until they openly tell you how they feel, assume you know nothing. So do not feel stressed or increase your suffering by getting obsessed with someone you have never met.
Once you contact or send a message to someone, just move on. You may get a response or not; therefore, detach yourself from any outcome. Widen your net and keep reaching out since online dating is more of a numbers game. The more prospects you contact, the better your return.
Review each profile carefully to get a good understanding of each person. Do not go for the looks only. Dig beneath the surface and understand exactly who that person is. A solid narrow search is good than a misdirected one.
Investing can be defined as spending too much time and energy, thinking about the person you recently met online. Some may go to an extent of showing him or her to their family and friends. Your time and energy are valuable; therefore take time before doing any kind of investment.
Do not presume.
It is best to minimize your expectations until you meet someone. Getting excited about your match based on the profile may lead to a lot of frustration. You might be persuaded to make presumptions about a match, and these presumptions will only make the person a viable choice for you even if they aren’t.
In short, dating online is much fun. Finding someone on a dating site is very practical nowadays, and if done appropriately, can bring you the match you are destined to meet.